In case you missed it, Entry #1 was the last post. Yes, I am going to continue talking about my experiences thus far disciplining a 1-year old (well, an almost 1-year old). I apologize if this bores you, I really do, because I know that before I had a child, I had just about no interest in them. But raising one = Lauren and Nathan's life these days, so, dear readers, that's whatcha get.
Anyway, here's the thing. When I was a kid, I lived for very few things. Among them were reading and tickling my brother. That second one might strike you as a little strange, but, you see, Ken is about the most ticklish person on the face of the earth. And boy, did I love to torture--excuse me, tickle--Ken. Oh my gosh, it was so fun.
I don't think I can quite convey how awesome it was to tickle Ken. The best word for it is satisfying, but that doesn't give you a sense of how seriously I enjoyed it. Looking back on it, tickling my brother was almost like an addiction. When I tickled him, it was like a craving had been fulfilled, or like a thirst had been quenched. Weird, but true.
So I tickled Ken just about every chance I got. The poor guy--once I got started, he was debilitated and pretty much couldn't fight back. I could get him going so well that I could touch him anywhere, even in a spot that isn't normally ticklish (like his forehead), and it would tickle him. I really did torture him.
Eventually, I developed strategies. For example, the best place to catch him and tickle him was in the car, because he couldn't get away. This, however, had a drawback, which was that my parents were witnesses of my cruelty, which always ended in punishment for me, because, as you can imagine, it got beyond the fun and games stage.
My parents came up with a lot of punishments for my tickling over the years. The one they say finally worked was making me pay a quarter (and later, a dollar) every time I tickled Ken. I was a penny-pincher, and I wanted to save my money for the stuff I really wanted, so I hated to be fined, docked, or monetarily punished in any way. But at some point, I realized that sometimes, dangit, it's just worth it. Sometimes, even though I knew an unpleasant punishment was coming my way, it was still worth it to me to put up with paying the price, literally, in order to have the pleasure of doing the crime.
Well, I think Noah must be like his mama. For some reason, he really loves pulling a wire that comes out of the back of our TV. The other thing he loves to do is swivel our flat screen. Okay, both of those things are not only annoying but dangerous. I can just see our heavy TV falling on him, and it freaks me out. So we have been telling him "no" and slapping his hand. (We have no doubt that he understands that what he is doing is wrong. He'll often turn and look at us with a wry, mischievous smile before he grabs the wire). The problem is that this discourages him not at all. He'll immediately turn back around and go back to do it again. Argh!!! It really is very frustrating that the discipline does not work at all. Even if we are totally consistent and do the same thing every single time he disobeys, he still goes back and messes with the TV five or six times in a row, until we can finally distract him with something else. It is simply too wildly attractive to him, for some reason. Just like tickling was for me. Just like me, disobeying is just worth the price, at least when it comes to touching and tugging on the TV.
Sigh.
We are going to have to get a new entertainment center/TV stand really soon, because I think we just need to put some physical distance between The Boy and his temptation.
However, it could be worse. I just want you all to think of Nathan's brother, Daniel, the next time your kid does something dangerous, and thank your lucky stars your child is not as inquisitive or mischievous as he was. Nathan's mom told me last night that she walked in on him doing various dangerous things when he was little, such as poking the back of the TV with a screwdriver and pulling a chair over to the stove in order to turn all the flaming burners on. Sheesh!
2 comments:
Lauren-just read your posts about discipline (via facebook), and they prompted many memories from not many months ago. I remember going through a dreadful stage with Owen around Nathan's age and thinking that 'discipline' of all forms was completely ineffective on him, and I had already spoiled him rotten beyond repair. He was defiant, had a snarly attitude and his favorite thing of all to put me over the edge was that he turned into a hair-puller and we had to quit all playgroups because ALL he would do was pull the other kids hair, on purpose, while screaming. I was rather devastated. Fast forward 6 months and most of those behaviors have disappeared and he is quite compliant right now. A very small part of the change had to do with us consistently saying no to the bad behaviors, removing him from situations, and distracting him. Time-outs, hand-hitting, etc. didn't work at all for us. But MOSTLY I really believe it was a developmental thing and he pretty much came through it on his own (despite us). So, not to say that you shouldn't take the infractions seriously--because that's part of what will help him learn--but don't worry too much. Mine's as impish as they come, and he's like a new boy lately. I just wish we could shut down the ticking clock counting down to the terrible twos in another few months...sigh! Good to see you this morning!
Mike's mom saw him walking across the front lawn one day, and in her motherly intuition, motioned for him to come inside. She asked him where he was going. He said, "I'm going over to (so-and-so's) house to make pipe bombs."
Precisely why I fear having a boy.
You might want to try the hand-slap, and also putting him in time out (literally for a minute) in his crib. I had to do that with Moriah a few times, and it was somewhat effective. I'd take all her stuff out of the bed & leave the lights on so she never confused time outs & naptime.
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